Frequently Asked Questions about singing telegrams:

Q: What is a singing telegram?
A: A singing telegram is more than just a person showing up and singing a song. It's a professional actor doing a ten to fifteen minute comedy skit as the character of your choice. We present the recipient with a party hat, a party horn, sing a comedy song for the occasion, cover them with streamers and work personal information into the verbal part of the show. They get a souvenir telegram to let them know who it's from, a free gift, and we wrap it up by getting everyone there to sing "Happy Birthday" or "For He's (or She’s!) a Jolly Good Fellow". They won't ever forget it!

Q: Where can you do a singing telegram?
A: Just about anywhere! We go to homes, offices, schools, and restaurants. It’s a good idea to call and make sure it’s okay with the boss, the principal, or the management. We use no bad language, but it can get a little noisy with all the laughter and applause! It is also a good idea to have a contact person at the location who knows we are coming but can keep it a surprise for the recipient.

Q: Should I call to confirm my reservation?
A: Once your order is entered into the computer you are all set. Placing an order takes just a few minutes and we give you a confirmation number to reference if you have any questions or need to add something. We always have live operators just waiting for your call Monday through Friday 8:00 AM till 5:00 PM, PST. You can call to confirm just to set your mind at ease but it is not necessary.

Q: The performers aren’t going to do anything lewd or crude, are they?
A: Eastern Onion® has been doing singing telegrams in the Bay Area since the ‘70’s. The characters have been evolving as the times have changed. The shows are designed to make someone the center of attention and also entertain the crowd. They are performed by actors who know how to think on their feet and improvise. We are not trying to shock or embarrass anyone. We use no bad language or rude costuming. Of course, anytime someone is made the center of attention it can be a little embarrassing, so watch out for paybacks!

Q: What guarantee do I have that the person will show up?
A: We use only professional actors, clowns, singers, musicians, etc. We screen our talent carefully. They will show up and do a wonderful job. Every once in a while a car will break down, or someone will break a leg the day of the show. There are always situations that are beyond our control, but the performer will call you.

Q: How much notice is needed?
A: As much as you can give us! We do provide same day service but advanced reservations are appreciated. (Less grey hair for the office staff!)

Q: Do you have a cancellation policy?
A: Yes. To cancel a visit you must contact us during business hours at least 48 hours in advance. Beyond that point, the best that we can offer is a postponement or credit on a future telegram. Some specialty characters (Santa, for example) require even more time. Call the office for specifics.

Q: Is tipping allowed?
A: Like, DUH! No, really folks: We are a service organization and your satisfaction is our priority. If you feel your performer has done an exceptional job, you may offer a gratuity at your discretion. We also appreciate any feedback you might have concerning our performer and his or her performance.